9 things that wise parents should not forbid children from doing

Psychologists believe that setting limits will make children feel safer and more calm in everything. However, reality has shown that certain limitations can have the opposite effect of making babies feel unsafe as well as inhibiting their development. Typically prohibiting, for example, sometimes we simply think it's good for ourselves, good for the baby or for certain situations, but there are things that mothers really shouldn't forbid children from doing. .

Aggressive, scolding and restraining are not the best parenting practices of today's parents. There are times when we lose our temper and lead to these inappropriate actions but that does not mean that we do not love children! Children rarely understand this, so they accidentally make the distance of parents and children even more apart.

The more parents forbid their children to do it, the more children want to do it

This is a fact that very few of us little accept or want to hear but the truth is. Dr. Rollins of Pennsylvania State University, USA, explained that the cause of the problem is the formation of a baby's desire to be free when he realizes that what their parents forbid is incorrect. every or at least the child has a reason to oppose what you are not trying to do.

With aFamilyToday Health take a simple example to visualize! Children love dishes such as sausages, snacks, and candies and when eating these, a bottle of soft drink is indispensable. Every child likes to eat every time on the way to school, when going to the supermarket or in free time at home. Of course you know these are not good for your child's health. Which ones contain sugar, is salt, is a colorant, a preservative, and then add a high amount of bad fat ...

Since then, you forbid children to eat such things with warnings such as: "Do not eat, poisonous mountain!" Or: "If you eat it, you will die!" or: "These things have nothing to eat fat to eat". However, she later observed that her friends at school ate and that the neighborhood children ate while they were playing together. At this point, your child will think your threats are lying and will end up asking for more of them.

Please refer to the article:  8 common parenting mistakes in parents

The ban isn't all bad, but it should be in the right place

Prohibition is how we prevent a child from doing something that we personally feel is not suitable for the child or that it is simply harmful for them. But in general, it is just thinking and your "subjective" view of a problem, absolutely does not bring any educational meaning to the child.

The prohibition will be correct when it happens in a situation of force majeure to prevent something harmful to the child. Typically: "You are not allowed to cross the road alone!" or: "I have to wait for my mother to pick me up when I leave school, not allowed to accompany strangers!" ...

And those "forbidden children to do" should stop at the temporary nature. Let's teach them the truth  and from the truth that the baby receives will form their proper perspective. Do not impose individual subjective views on the child's head because that is not the right way to teach children.

Returning to the example of delicious snack packages, candies or sausages, we as adults think it is extremely "toxic". It is best in this situation to tell your child the truths behind it, not to intimidate them outright. Although they are children, they are also very observant!

9 things that should not be forbidden to children

Here are 9 things that we should not forbid children to do if they do not want to one day become more stubborn and opposed to you.

1. Make the baby stop crying

The most common bullying sentence that everyone in life has ever heard is: “Dad / Mom counts to 3 if you still cry, I'll give you to Mr. K” or “will leave me” or “will hit you”…

Children perceive the world in a different way from adults. They are much more sensitive, so instead of scolding, intimidating or embarrassing your baby more, think about why the baby is crying and solve the problem.

2. Say "No" to anything

Vietnamese people or Asians in general have the thought that "Mom and Dad put me where I sit". But children are never private property, we cannot force them to say "yes" or "agree" when we want them to do things they don't like. When children can say "no", it means that they can think independently, they have the ability to decide on some of their own problems.

Instead of infringing upon children's individual rights, we should put ourselves in their thoughts and situations to better understand them. Prohibiting children from doing something is not difficult, but how to understand them is a real challenge.

3. Make a mistake is not something in the parent's dictionary

No one is born perfect and we adults cannot be perfect on the first day of work. Children too, toddlers, the first time they change clothes or the first days of school, the fathers and mothers want their children to do everything. Especially when we go to school, we often scold if our child gets a bad grade even though we can gently encourage them to try harder. Remember that failure is always the mother of success, stumbling or making mistakes before babies can get up on their own.

4. Do not act impatient

One of the things that parents absolutely should not forbid children from doing is that children must not express their feelings. As humans, everyone will lose their temper, temper, and control at times, and children are no exception. Moreover, with children, the ability to control their own emotions is not high.

Prohibiting children in this situation sometimes leads to "instant water breaking". Sometimes you should calm down, sit down and ask your baby what is the problem and then work with him.

5. Don't ask again

Children are God asking a lot, right? Parents who have children all experience the feeling of being extremely bothered by countless questions from "Mars" that we ourselves have no answer.

The truth is, if you don't ask, that's the problem! Because asking a lot is considered an indispensable process in the developmental stage of each child. The sincere advice is that instead of banning your child from asking questions, honestly answer: "We don't know, but at some point they will have an answer for you!" when they ask difficult questions.

6. Do not be selfish

In some cases, selfishness is not bad. Just like adults, children sometimes have the right to keep things for themselves, so don't be too surprised if your child doesn't share toys, books or food with friends. Teaching your baby to share lessons is not superfluous, but please understand for them at times like this.

Please refer to the article:  Teaching children to share incorrectly will cause bad consequences for children

7. Prohibit children from making noise

Children play and play often make a lot of noise and sometimes we adults get annoyed by it. A single scold from you is the whole fun of the baby is over.

Children today are under more pressure than ever, so let them live freely with their childhood. Parents should not take away the joy of children just because they are bothered with their children's lovely songs or laughter.

8. Do not be afraid

In the depth, each person always exists its own fear. So don't "force" your child not to be afraid of something. Sometimes, unintentionally or unintentionally, statements like: "There's nothing to be afraid of" or: "Why are you so shy?" Again, it can make the child feel hurt. So don't stop children from being afraid of something. In some situations, fear is the perfect "barie" that protects children from danger.

9. You must not keep a secret

The older the child, the more he needs his own privacy. Parents may worry and care about their children's lives but that does not mean invading their privacy. Stealing your child's phone messages, diary ... will be the fastest way to alienate children and become more hostile to their parents.

Do not force children to tell secrets they want to keep if they do not want to lose their trust in them. The best approach is still communication with children. If you build trust with your child, make sure that when the time is right, she will not hesitate to tell her secret stories to you.

Children are not small adults, they have vulnerable emotions, emotions as well as immature thoughts. As an adult and also a child, let's put ourselves in and think like a child so we can understand him better. Prohibiting your child from doing something is not difficult but understanding your child is the most important thing!