Parents of helicopters make small brains slow to develop

Helicopter parents is a term used to refer to parents who always pay too much attention to every action, whether big or small, of their children, but advocate that it is all due to the care of their children.

Why are parents watching the child?

You can become a helicopter parent in a willful or unintentional direction and it all comes from your love and concern for your children. There are four common reasons parents are always watching their kids:

1. Afraid of sad children

Parents who are worried about the failures that might happen to their children should do everything they can to help their children avoid having a low score at school or disappointment in life. However, when adults control children's behavior and do not give them private time, it can result in the baby's inability to think and handle situations, and the ability to struggle to protect. protect yourself.

2. Excessive anxiety

Right from the time the baby was born or even before, parents worried about things that could profoundly affect their children later on, such as bad friends, illness ... thereby creating an invisible cocoon. and keep them inside to protect them anytime, anywhere.

3. Excessive perfection

Some parents have been neglected or unloved when they were young and should be overly cautious about having children. They always pay attention and follow up to make sure that they do not have to endure the same disadvantages as they have experienced, but unfortunately, this concern goes in the negative direction.

4. Influence by other people

Parents can still be influenced by other parents from time to time. According to experts, when one sees a friend or another person acting overly controlling the child, the parent puts pressure to be like them. Parents feel that their parenting is not good enough, so they monitor and control more and become a part of the helicopter parent community.

Helicopter parent's sign

If you find yourself in most of the situations below, you may have become a helicopter parent but just don't realize:

When your baby has conflicts with friends, you take action, not the child

Do exercises to give your child more time to play

Intervene in the way the teacher teaches the child, even though it is not known right or wrong

Always follow your baby anywhere

Don't teach your child how to accept mistakes, but often find reasons to blame

Do not allow your child to experience like peers

Do not allow your child to make their own decisions.

The consequences of becoming a helicopter parent

Becoming a helicopter parent means depriving your child of self-motivation, independence and self-control. Professor Larry Nelson of  Brigham Young University , USA, said that any form of control is negative and harmful to young children during the period of baby brain development. He also cited consequences for how this will impact the child's morale, including:

1. Anxiety and depression

Parents who overprotect their children can always invade, imposing unrealistic expectations on their own children. A 2016 study concluded that children growing up in a family with helicopter parents experience fatigue, increasing their risk of anxiety and depression .

2. Lack of confidence

According to research published in the journal Emerging Adulthood, young children are raised by less confident helicopter parents, but often withdraw in self-contained or only do things with adult support. Even when parents give their children lots of love, it does not work because the baby really needs a safe space to learn, correct and challenge themselves.

3. Always dependent

If you always cover your baby in a safe area, of course the baby will start completely dependent on you, waiting for parents to make a decision even though it's the simplest and easiest problems to deal with. Of course, at first you will think this is true, but gradually, the habit can make you and your child feel tired and restless.

4. Aggressive and selfish

Psychologists say that young children living in families with overprotective habits develop selfishness and rudeness. From there, the child will react to parental control in an extreme direction. Children begin to engage in verbal or physical violence on their peers to feel balanced.

How not to become a helicopter parent?

Trust your baby when he or she performs a task

Equip the necessary knowledge for children

Do not overreact when your child does something wrong and always encourage him or her if he fails

Patiently observed before the intervention

Listen to your baby's words instead of always giving advice or even solving problems for him

Create conversations that stimulate critical thinking and problem solving skills

Emphasizing strength, courage is an opportunity to learn

Reward your children for their hard work in addition to success.