If you want your child to be independent, dont do these 10 things for him

Parents often want their children to be independent so that they can be successful in later life. However, to realize this desire is not easy. Pay attention to the 10 things mentioned in the article of aFamilyToday Health.

Adults cannot live a child's life, but only be there to help them develop and have enjoyable experiences for themselves. In addition, you should not impose your love or thoughts if you want your children to be independent. The following article, aFamilyToday Health will introduce 10 situations you should avoid while raising children.

1. Speak for your child

One of the most common situations when taking children out and meeting acquaintances. That person will often ask, "What's your name?" At this point, most parents will quickly: "My name is Nam". This really shouldn't be. If your baby is able to speak, let him answer other people's questions instead of answering on his behalf. The baby is the one being asked, not the parents. When you let children answer such questions on their own, they will be able to respond to others.

So, if you want your child to be independent, give him the opportunity to answer all the questions about you and try to control his feelings of wanting to speak for him.

2. Become your child's friend

Many people try to make friends with their children because they want to learn more about their thoughts and aspirations. However, to become your child's friend is not easy. Sometimes parents care, love their children too much and have invaded their privacy or their freedom. Actually, there is no need to work hard to be your friend. Let your kids find their true friends and that parents are there only when they need their love and support.

3. Need and want

You know that broccoli is much healthier than candy, but kids won't see it. Therefore, you often command your child what they should do with little mention of its effects.

As a result, the child feels inhibited by always following commands without knowing why he should do so. This causes your child to generate thoughts that are against you. Therefore, you need to find out your baby's real needs and fulfill it. If you intend to teach your child good habits, do it slowly.

4. Helping children too much

Children 2 - 3 years old can dress or remove their own clothes, wash dishes, put dirty things in the washing machine and they really want to do it on their own. However, parents often want to replace their children by feeding their children, dressing them up, bathing and washing them, not giving their children the opportunity to experience small things at home. After that, parents lamented and disappointed when their children had grown up and did not know what to do, no matter how heavy it was, they would count on them. 

Want your child to be independent, let him learn to take care of himself from a young age. Do not be afraid that you will make a mistake or become a joke because these are all memorable memories of your growing up.

5. Decide to replace the child

Some parents try to impose tastes, preferences or dress style on their children because they think they will orient the correct baby. However, this approach reduces a child's individuality. In many cases, the baby will resist by doing the opposite of what the parents want.

The best thing you can do is learn about your child's interests, watch a certain movie with your child, talk freely about their favorite idols to better bond with them.

6. Manage your baby's money

In the life of every child, there is a time when a baby needs his own money. You should not ask your children about the amount of money they receive by checking their bags and bags. This action kills the child's trust in his parents.

Instead, you should encourage your child to spend smart money from small lessons like paying the price when shopping, setting up a savings book for example.

7. Choose hobbies for your child

I want my daughter to play the piano well and is willing to take the time to take her to music class 3 times a week, and the other father wants his son to play soccer every night to be healthy or become a good player in the future. hybrid. If this feels like you, you are imposing your own interests on your children.

If you want your child to be independent, be patient, paying attention to what your real interests are. When I really like it, every time I do something I feel passionate and do my best. Then, you will help your child develop those skills instead of forcing him to do things he doesn't want.

8. See your child's success as yours

It is not difficult to see photos posted on social networks with status statements such as: "Mother and child practice walking", "My father and son learn to swim together" ... accompanied by comments praising both adults and children. However, is the purpose of teaching children to do these things just to satisfy themselves and see their success as their own?

As the kids get older, things can get more serious. Mothers and fathers began to talk about how their children went to college and how to find jobs, how their salaries were, and then viewed it as an achievement in the race who taught them better. This idea is very popular and also makes many children bored or even disgusted with their parents' achievements.

Do you want your child to be independent and successful in the future? So please cherish every baby's efforts even the smallest, motivate them at all times and erase the thought that your child must be better than others.

9. Change baby to choose gifts

When a child can speak, he has the right to choose what he wants to do. It is not a shirt or a productive and intellectual toy. Of course, you may not always be free to choose, but this will give your baby the important lesson of being able to make choices, make decisions and deal with the consequences. These skills are never superfluous if you want your child to be independent. Therefore, encourage your baby to say the gift he wants.

10. Interfering with your child's private life

When your child enters puberty, are you afraid that your child will get a bad habit from friends, so manage your child more closely or think that it is not good for your child to like a friend of the opposite sex? If you have this, you should relax and simplify things a bit.

When you see your child hanging out with a partner of the opposite sex, you will question them by all means. However, this only makes the youth more tired. Children will share about their opposite sex if they feel safe and trust their parents. Children need a private space and keep secret things to become more independent instead of facing adult judgment and direction.